new post

Yesterday instead of writing a new post I added some old post. Since these were post I had already started writing earlier in the year, they posted on the original dates. Now if you want to read them you have to go back through all my old post. If you are a follower I think it sends you a direct link. The rest of you, I'm sorry.

The names I call people...

I call people names all the time. I often have friends who have the same name. I know I could call them by their first and last name, but why when I can make up something better.
Here are a few people I have had in my life. I have changed the names.

The other Renee (our neighbor at one time)
Fun Renee
Nashville Renee
Bingo Mary
Across the Street Mary
Crazy Diane
Everyone loves Raymond Diane
Swinging Jane
Incredibles/Lake Jane
Niece Jane

K. was telling me I should blog about Incredibles Jane. Asking if she knew she was Incredibles Jane. I said no I call her Lake Jane. We were lol and suddenly she stops and looks at me and says what do you call me. I told her she didn't have another name only her real name.

So how did Incredibles Jane get her name? The first time K. met Jane, Jane was talking about how she would not let her kids watch The Incredibles because the woman cartoon character had a low cut outfit. K. had on a tight low cut shirt. A few days later K. asked me if Jane said anything about her low cut shirt. I told her no, but Incredibles Jane had her name that day.

Covering the gray......

A friend convinced me I should let her color my gray. We went to Sally Beauty Supply to buy the needed supplies. The YOUNG girl who was helping us said I wouldn't use that,when I colored my grandmothers hair...... I told her she could go in the back we didn't need her help. The other young girl thought that was to funny. So they both helped us find what we needed. I told the first girl I was just joking. I don't remember what all was said but it was a very funny time.

We get home and begin the process. The time applying the color was fairly fast. The fun started when we begin to rinse out the color in the sink. Here is the conversation.

kat: Scoot forward a little bit.
I stand up on my tiptoes
kat: Not on your tiptoes
me: I can't scoot forward my boobs are stuck on the ledge of the sink.
by standing on my tiptoes I was able to scoot forward then not stand on my tiptoes
me: You are getting my shirt wet.
kat: it's not your shirt, it's mine
me: my bra is soaked
kat: well you moved forward and I shot the water down your shirt. But your hair looks so good really.

We were laughing and screaming so hard the kids thought there was another rat in the garage.

Lifeguards and my kids

My kids could swim before they could walk. They took swim lessons starting at 6 months. We went year round to this wonderful indoor pool. We loved it. Many people think you should not teach children to swim so young, I always thought it was great. It does come with it's own set of problems.

Most people are not prepared to see a 2 year old jump off the side of the pool and swim. This is something I was always needing to remind myself.

Once we were on vacation and went to the pool. It was my oldest daughter who was 14, my son who was 4 and my baby girl who was 2. When we got to the pool the entire shallow end was packed. No one was at the deep end which was maybe 4ft, dd14 and I could touch. So we went to the deep end. Dd14 jumped in and I was still putting all of our stuff in chairs. The two littles ones each had swim noodles, they asked me if they could get in, I told dd14 to watch them. They threw their noodles in and I was putting towels in our chairs. Suddenly I hear a woman scream, I turn to see her throw her book and run to the side of the pool. I run to the side of pool, which is about 3 feet from me, thinking her kid is drowning. I get to the side and see my two swimming to their noodles. She looks at me and says I thought they couldn't swim. I tell her they swim very well and their big sister is right there. After that I always made sure I was sitting on the side of the pool or in the pool where they were jumping in. I did this even if my older kids were in the pool with the little ones.

Another time we were at the public pool that has this wonderful short fast water slide. I was in the water with the kids. They asked if they could go down the slide. They had done this many times before and most of the lifeguards at the pool knew them. I am in the water and ds 6 comes down the slide and swims to the side. DD who was 4 at the time comes down the slide and this time there is a new lifeguard at the slide when she sees dd coming down the slide and no one at the bottom to catch her she jumps in. DD starts swimming towards me and the lifeguard is swimming after her. After a few seconds she stops looks at dd, me and the other lifeguards. The other lifeguard tells her my kids can swim. The lifeguard laughs and says oh well it was hot anyways.

There are to many stories like this to write about. There was the time we went to a public pool with friends dd was 2 and ds 4. My friend had kids the same age who could swim. The girls were about to go off the diving board and the life guards all started blowing their whistles and screaming. They made the girls get off the diving board. Got all 4 of our kids and made them take a swim test before they would let them in the pool. I do not think that was standard policy.

Maybe if they did make all kids take a swim test before they could get in the pool we would have less drownings. I was never mad at the lifeguards or strangers for trying to make sure my kids safe. Just embarrassed. I was always right there. ALWAYS.

This post is getting to long so I will write what made me start thinking about all this later.

Did you miss me?

Or did you even know I was gone?
I was gone for a while. My ISP was sold to another company. The other company was not nice. I will put that nicely. What I really want to do is take an out in the paper to tell people just how horrible they were. Anyways now I have a new ISP and they are great. So I am back.

I have so many things to blog about I don't know where to start. Which story should be first?

1. The friend who was going through receipts and saw her husband bought condoms and gum. That's it only thing on the receipt. She told him he could of bought some other things to hide the condoms. He said well the guy in line in front of me bought condoms and doughnuts. I guess that makes it all ok.
2. About the fact that baseball and softball season makes me gain weight.
3. Why I have a green swimming pool.
4. My daughter has a video clip she wants to send to America's Funniest Home Videos. I want to send it to the City Manager. It shows her swinging and the swing breaks.
5. How I wish I had an alligator story. Someone probably has that story who will not even blog about it. I need the good alligator story. I want to be able to say One night I was driving down the highway and saw an alligator. Some people have all the luck.
6. That my cousin is crazy.
7. I know there are more but that is all I can remember right now.

Boobie Smashing

I had an appointment today to have my boobies smashed. When the dr. told me I had to have this done, he spent ten minutes telling me how I should of already went. I told him maybe he should give me a tranquilizer for this appointment. He laughed and said it's not that bad. I said that is easy for you to say.

I arrived at the office thinking maybe I should just skip this. The lady asked me if I was ready. I told her maybe I needed to be sedated. She laughed and said I promise it is not as bad as you have heard. She spent several minutes explaining everything and making sure I was ready. She told me it might be uncomfortable but it will be tolerable. I kept thinking she doesn't know how low my pain tolerance is.
Did I blog about giving blood? I can't remember. It wasn't a good experience. I had a bruise two weeks later. Ok back to today.

The worst part of today is the having to stand still. She tells you don't breath and be still. I wanted to move so bad. She asked if it was as bad as I thought. I said the standing still part is the worst. She said she had one lady who told her but I can feel my heart beating. LOL

So ladies don't put this off. It is not bad, I promise. Throw modesty out the window. Once you throw modesty out the window you will be fine.

I don't know why everyone says it is so bad. It was not bad. Not something I want to do every day but I would rather do that than donate blood again.

Going straight from the turn lane.......

Going Straight from the turn lane......

The Officer in the car behind you does not care that you waited until the other cars were gone first.

He does care that you are making him wait while you try to go straight when you should be turning.

He does no care if doing this is going to get you to your dr.'s appoinment on time.

He does not care if you never really meant to be in the turn lane in the first place.

I promise it is going to take longer to explain all of this to the law enforcement officer than if you would of just turned and went the long way. Your dr. might leave before you get to the office. Just turn and save yourself the trouble. Or maybe you want to miss your appointment and go through all this again.